But the evidence to support my assumption that you equate nerdiness with unattractiveness, and that you seem to think good looking women don’t go for geeks is: “Peter Parker and his friend Clark Kent over here swoop in and nail the two hottest girls at the bar! What the shit is that?”

I understand that the point of the blog is to celebrate that this experiences proves to you that an assumption you held your whole life (that an awkward nerd can get a sexy girl) is, in fact, not fiction aftterall. That from this you see that nerds can hope!

Despite this, you still seem to be filled with a lot of doubt. I mean even at the end of this you are still referring to it all as fantasy: “Well where ever you are lone man and Chicken fucking thick glasses, I hope nothing but the best for you regardless of my negative tones and harsh words. Ultimately, I’m just jealous. For your ability to turn my fantasy into a reality.” You don’t seem to really believe that nerds can be attractive and that pretty girls can desire them. It is almost as if you are using this story to try and prove it to yourself. Not that you already believe and are trying to prove it to others.

And what I meant by the last comment is that you see Chicken glasses and the other guy and automatically label them as “nerds.” And you see those hot girls and automatically label them as the “unattainable, beautiful women.” Further you label yourself as the “awkward nerd.” But it all seems like stereotypes. And I understand that there is truth in all of this, as all stereotypes are based in reality, but nerds can be extremely charismatic and charming; hot chicks can be intelligent, or dorky. Putting people into categories, as natural an instinct as it is, is often a risky business. And maybe the fiction you immerse yourself in is actually reinforcing these stereotypes of “nerds,” “underdogs who succeed,” ideal women, etc. rather than breaking them down. That is my counter point. Maybe fiction is making you label people, rather than seeing people as individuals. And perhaps it is making you focus on the way people may be labeling you, rather than encouraging you to trust in your own individuality, and to trust that other people can see value your individuality too.

I may not have articulated any of this well. And it may not make sense regardless. Let me know if anything I said makes sense.

P.S. A lot of what I am saying may be coming from my own stereotypes about comics and many popular films primarily containing stock characters.

HEY! Yes! I love your blog! I read it all the time! I get so many ideas for recipes and places to eat as a result. So good. Keep it up.

“i always felt it was pretty douchey to just walk up to someone and start talking.”

Right? It sucks. I hate it. Maybe I feel this way too is because I’m from a sort of similar scene? Because I know plenty of women and men who feel this way within the goth scene as well as the indie hipster scenester scene.

“in the goth scene, you usually either got an introduction through a mutual acquaintance, or if you showed up at the same club enough times and saw the same person enough times, it became more acceptable to just start up a conversation. more likely, the conversation would start on the dance floor by dancing in the general area of your interest.”

This brings up a really interesting point. This is precisely how I met anyone I’ve ever met out. Never by going out up and talking to them. This is also how anyone met me.

Thanks for the comment!

I’m not sure that I do. Was there something in particular that I said that makes you feel this way?

“Why do you assume that good looking women don’t like quirky, intellectual men?”

Again, I’m not sure that I do. Was there something in particular that I said that makes you feel this way?

“But maybe these fictions are also depicting stock characters that are molding your definition of what it means to be a “man” and a “woman” in terms of stereotypes.”

Elaborate, please.

And, also, MAKE MINE MARVEL!

in the goth scene, you usually either got an introduction through a mutual acquaintance, or if you showed up at the same club enough times and saw the same person enough times, it became more acceptable to just start up a conversation. more likely, the conversation would start on the dance floor by dancing in the general area of your interest. being a goth club, people didn’t dance _together_. i know, convoluted.

me personally, i’m shy and i’m not going up and starting a conversation with any stranger. don’t care how many drinks are in me. later years out of the club scene, just hanging out with friends at bars, i met no one that wasn’t a friend of a friend.

it’s too early for this and my comment is a bunch of incoherent rambling. and no help at all. oh yeah, and nerd boys rule. i like mine.

One time you asked me what I consider “weird,” male, social behavior, and I basically have two answers:
1. Older men that hit on younger girls
and
2. Douchey “vultures” that go to clubs and stand there watching the girls as if a dance floor is a center ring of a circus. Seriously if you think I’m cute then come talk to me, come dance with me. Don’t stare at me from a wall. That is fricken creepy!

Do other ladies out there agree?

And maybe this isn’t true for all girls, and girls in packs can do odd things, but typically if a guy approaches me and tries to strike up conversation, or flirts with me in a natural, playful way, then I am going to be flattered. Even if I do not accept his advances, it will probably make my day.

So, I know this is SOOOOOOO much easier said than done, but definitely approach girls. Even if they reject you, I guarantee you will make them feel good about themselves. Everyone wants to be noticed and admired, even if she pretends otherwise. And you don’t know if you don’t try, right?